Impacts – Leadership is a Choice #24
Jessica Soroky continues her series Leadership is a Choice.
Beliefs change over time. They grow and evolve and sometimes alter so drastically they no longer resemble what once they were. Then there are beliefs you’ve had for a very long time, staying strong and firm from their first moment.
I have a few of those beliefs, ones I have had since I was a child. One in particular stems from magical drives through downtown Columbus. As a child every time my family took a trip through downtown I would smush my face against the car window to try and see the top of the buildings that never seemed to end. I would get completely lost imaging the jobs held by the people walking the streets in their fancy suits and briefcases. I believed they were each changing the world in one way or another. As they walked through the revolving doors of the giant buildings I saw in their hands such limitless possibilities.
I have now stood at the tops of those building next to the people in their fancy suits and briefcases. My mind gets lost in the idea that every day, every choice we make, they make, changes the world, our world. It has an impact even if we don’t see it.
Sitting comfortably as the plane descends from the clouds I stare out over a city that has been home for so long and wonder how many of these people believe in their endless capabilities the way I believe in them? I wonder how many understand or are aware that they have an impact and an opportunity to change something.
Smashed against the glass in that car I didn’t dream of a day where I would be one those people on the streets. No, I believed there would be a day where I would lead those people. I had no idea what that looked like, all I knew is that the knot in my gut told me to reach as high as I possibly could.
I still believe that and for a very, very long time I never would have admitted it to anyone in fear that I would be judged. Looking back at the fear I think it was more based in the idea that someone would tell me it wasn’t possible, that I couldn’t do it.
I can do it. I can do whatever I choose, whatever I want to do.
To this day, many years later, I have an undeniable desire to reach as high as possible. For the first time in my entire life I am finally starting to see clearly what I am reaching for. I see it, I feel it, and I can bring it to life. It feels like a bolt of lightning is surging through my veins, pulsating, waiting to be released every time I talk about this vision. I feel it lighten my step and brighten my mood every time I allow my brain to go freely down the rabbit hole of this belief and vision.
In those buildings working with the people from the streets I quickly became aware that the level of belief I am experiencing may not be common or they may have just gotten better at hiding the physical signs of it from everyone else. I started to wonder why I believed in this so much?
I sat in a meeting around a conference room table with a wall of windows across from me and got lost staring at the trees thinking about this question. Why do I believe in this vision so much? The conference room door slammed shut, jarring me back to reality and it hit me just like that – I believe in me, implicitly and unquestionably and therefore I believe in my vision, my purpose.
I have always believed in me but there were years and years that went by where the limitations the world perceives began to become the limitations I perceived and distracted me from my implicit and unquestionable belief in myself.
This journey, this roller coaster ride, into 100% responsibility, living by choice and enabling my power and freedom has all been an extremely deep desire to refocus on my belief in me. The calls, the blogs, and the tears that focused on shame and anxiety and problems were real and necessary to get to here. What is to come next will all be necessary as well.
YOUR journey, YOUR fight, and YOUR hard work are all necessary to get to YOUR place of implicit and unquestionable belief. Keep going, keep fighting, keep calling in, keep participating and keep reading. More important than anything – keep believing in YOU.
“When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable” – Walt Disney
Jessica Soroky, CSM
Jessica is a Certified Scrum Master with over three years of practice in agile delivery and seven years of team leadership. She is also the youngest participant in The Leadership Gift™ Program and its growing worldwide community of leaders and coaches. After five years of non-profit development through Nellie’s Catwalk for Kids, Jessica continues her leadership journey in state government, not-for-profit, and private sector leadership studies.
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